This is the story of a man named Tyler D. He worked for a company in a big building, though he had neither an office nor an employee number. He performed a lot of duties, and his schedule was different every week. Some may consider this to be frustrating, as Tyler did… but still, he enjoyed his job, even if he despised the inconsistency of the schedule. The people were nice, it aligned with his interests, and money is always a nice thing to have.
Then, one day, as Tyler searched for games to play in his spare time, he came across something very peculiar:
The Stanley Parable: Ultra Deluxe.
Stanley, Stanley… this name sounded so familiar, thought Tyler. Had he, in the past, caught a glimpse of a Let’s Play series on it? Perhaps the name came to him through some divine revelation. Perhaps his roulette-like schedule had driven him insane, and he’s now gone so far as to craft his own Narrator, in an attempt to distract himself from the ever-present darkness of insanity that threatens to engulf his mind.
Whatever the case, Tyler could remember little of this so-called parable, other than that it was quite entertaining. So, as he came across the news of its remaster, he just couldn’t resist the call to return to the Memory Zone and experience first-hand the… er… experience that is The Stanley Parable, and all of its new and exciting content.
As he played through the game, Tyler indeed realized that this was quite an excellent game, and well worth the money. Indeed, it was a phoenix of quality arisen from the ashes of depravity, as the game’s Narrator so eloquently put it.
He then proceeded to praise the game for its insightful commentary regarding the nature of video games, and its clever examination of narrative gaming tropes. Tyler also realized that the Narrator had said something along these lines as well, and decided he should stop para-phrasing the game’s quotes, as brilliantly written as they are.
But then what, pray tell, could he say? Could he be so witty as to come up with a review both original and interesting to read for the ten readers who would click on this page? Sure, he could sympathize with Stanley’s wanderlust, but as he was not an office worker and did not push buttons for a living, the similarities between them rather abruptly ended there.
He was also sure he wasn’t the only person to comment on the sheer genius of this game: the clever and hilarious branching paths, the stellar storytelling, and of course the snarky Narrator, voice-acted by the impeccable Kevan Brighting.
What, if anything, could Tyler add to this discussion that hadn’t already been said? Perhaps nothing… but perhaps nothing needed to be said, other than the fact that the game had truly resonated with him. It appealed to his love of the nonsensical through its more Dadaistic tendencies, while still allowing itself to be serious at appropriate moments, and he had never before realized just how much he had needed the calming presence of a bucket in his life. Truly, it was a work of art.
He just couldn’t stay quiet. Sure, it had one or two bugs, and a few more endings would’ve been appreciated, but all in all it was a most thrilling saga, and well-deserving of the title Ultra Deluxe.
Needless to say, The Stanley Parable: Ultra Deluxe deserves no less than the highest rating Tyler can give it: Pristine Condition. He looks forward to the newest upcoming entry in the series, The Stanley Parable 3: Race To The Didgeridoo.
Tyler DeWriter 